This week’s can’t-miss event: Open Mic Night at Phoebe’s
Come enjoy some seriously talented student performers in the quaint atmosphere of Phoebe's Garden Cafe. If you strum, sing, write poetry, of have any other performance talent, stop by and showcase what you got!
Phoebe’s Garden Café
900 E. Genesee St., across from Syracuse Stage
All ages welcome
Where’s My Money
Odd characters, bizarre speeches, strange plot twists, and even what looks like the opening credits sequence of a TV show–minus the credits.
Starting Friday, February 27, 8pm
Black Box Players
820 E. Genesee St.
UP
After strapping 42 helium balloons and yourself to a lawn chair and sailing, successfully, 16,000 feet in the air, what else is left to do in life? Playwright Bridget Carpenter tells the story of Walter Griffin, based on the real-life person “Lawnchair Larry,” and other daredevil aerialists.
Starting Friday, February 27, 8pm
Syracuse Stage
820 E. Genesee St.
DanceWorks presents DW Air
Get ready for take-off! The largest club sport at SU takes you high in the sky when they present their annual showcase. Look for numbers like “Broken-hearted Soul” choreographed by Dani Houghton and “Forever to Bleed” by Courtney Smith.
February 26-28, 8pm
Goldstein Auditorium
SU Men’s Lacrosse v Virginia
Friday, February 27, 7pm
Carrier Dome
Lights & Scarlet Ending
Don’t be fooled by the name. Lights is not a band, she’s a girl from Toronto. And, although she describes herself as a small girl, this pop-rock crooner has played all over the world. Check out her latest single, “February Air.” The Scarlet Ending, however, is a band made up a six Syracuse area, indie rock artists and a variety of instruments including bass, cello, guitar, drums, violin, accordion, and a penny whistle.
Saturday, February 26, 8pm
Funk N Waffles
SU Women’s Polo Tournament
The team takes on three big schools–Colgate, Cornell, NYU–but will they succeed?
Saturday, February 28, 12pm
Sunday, March 1, 2pm
Archbold Gym
Smokey Joe’s Café
SU’s Starving Artists will be jamming on stage when they present this classic musical that features 39 pop, rock, and R&B hits.
Sunday, March 1, 8pm
Goldstein Auditorium
P.S. Don’t forget about the Winter Carnival events!
-Amelia Bienstock
Amelia wants to know about your event! E-mail [email protected] and tell her the skinny.
Today I’m reviewing Santa Claus Conquers the Martians from 1964, which I got from my contact at the Ministry of Absurdly-Titled Movies (along with Teenagers From Outer Space, The Wild Women of Wongo, and my personal favorite, Eegah!). It’s directed by—you know what, it’s Santa Claus Conquers the Motherf@#$in’ Martians, what more do you want?
I’m watching this one with a drink I’ve named the White Dominican. It’s one part rum to one part vodka to two parts milk or cream. I don’t know if it’s a real drink or not, but it’s all I’ve got in my liquor cabinet.
From the movie’s blurb: “[The Martians] return to Mars with Santa and the children in tow, but are thwarted when he converts the Martian children with unstoppable Yuletide joy.”
I’m so excited I just peed a little. Let’s get to it:
00:01: We open with the most obnoxious Christmas song ever, sung by a chorus of obnoxious children. No song has ever sounded good by a chorus of children. Just annoying.
Bad start.
1:00: We’ve got a news real of special correspondent Andy Anderson reporting live from the North Pole. It’s being watched by Martians. So we’ve already established the existence of Santa Claus and Martians. I’m glad we didn’t diddle around with that.
3:00: Andy Anderson is creepy. Santa is even creepier.
3:10: “Dancer and Prancer and Donner and Nixon—” Did Santa just make a Nixon joke?
4:00: Enter Mrs. Claus who, upon realizing she’s on camera, fumbles with her hair and squeels off screen in a fit of womanly embarrasment. Santa and Andy have a hearty laugh. Silly women.
5:00: We get a look at the toyshop and Andy finds a toy that looks remarkably like a Martian. “Oh, Winky made that one,” says Santa. Winky is apparenly both clichéd and clairvoyant.
7:00: Cut to Mars. Martians are purple, wear grey jumpsuits, and wear helmets with antennae.
A Martian is calling for Droppo, who he finds sleeping and wakes up with a wand. We’re informed that Droppo is the laziest man on Mars—also the silliest.
Enter food pills. What else would Martians eat?
8:00: Our Martian protagonist is named Keymar. His wife is Momar. They speak English with a Martian accent. Apparenly Keymar is the leader of the Martians. And Momar is kind of hot.
We learn through some dialogue that the children of Mars have been losing their appetites and having trouble sleeping, and this seems to have something to do with their watching television programs from Earth.
They decide to consult an ancient prophet that lives in the wilderness.
12:00: The other Martian council chiefs are gathered in the forest and we can see from the start that Boldar is an asshole—he heads not the advice of the prophet.
14:00: The prophet is Tim from Monty Python’s The Holy Grail. He knows about Christmas, and this knowledge explains everything.
16:00: Martian children never learn to play, have fun, etc. “The children must be allowed to be children again…” Clearly, the Martians need to kidnap Santa Claus.
Boldar wants none of this. “Bah!” he says. The children will just get annoying if we bring Santa to Mars. I’m with Boldar if it means they’re going to sing that song.
20:00: Approaching Earth in the Martian rocket. They scan the surface for Santa Claus, optically. With telescopes. Great dialogue by Boldar:
(Sneering) “So that’s what the Earth people call a city, eh. How primitive. Look at all those buildings above ground! Why we could destroy that city with one blast of our Q-ray!”
Yes.
They decide to land.
23:00: Cut to news bulletin about an unidentified object in orbit. Cut to stock footage of a military response.
Another news bulletin about the object disappearing from radar: “They believe the object has either disintegrated in space, or it may be a spaceship from some other planet which has the ability to nullify our radar beams.” Those two, and only those two, possibilities.
25:00: More stock footage of a military response.
27:00: Still stock footage.
30:00: Cut to two boys in the woods talking about Martians. “What would you do if a Martian walked right up behind you?” I bet I can guess what happens next.
Martians walk right up behind them.
They react just like little kids would—make pithy remarks about their antennae, totally narc on Santa.
31:00: Oh! One of the little boys is actually a little girl. Well I’ll be.
32:00: News bulletin about kids going missing. It’s nice how every plot point of this movie makes the breaking news.
35:00: They arrive at the North Pole and put Droppo in charge of watching the children. I can’t imagine this leading to the children’s escape in any way.
Keymar mentions activating “Tork,” and Boldar responds in disbelief that “Tog” would be necessary to capture Santa. Keymar responds that they won’t take any chances and that “nothing can stop Tork.” Boldar says “Tog” again just to reinforce that no one in this movie is really sure what that name actually is. Anway, I hope it’s a robot.
Kids overhear this, and the girl asks: “What a Tau?” Was there even a script for this movie?
40:00: The North Pole looks remarkably like Mars, but blue instead of red. The kids are outside and should, by all rights, be frozen to death by now.
41:00: Boldar is such an asshole.
42:00: They summon Torg to chase the children. Eeee.
43:00: The girl is whining about the cold, which would be more realistic if instead of whining she was freezing to death.
45:00: Sweet crisscrossin’ Christ. This is the kind of D-Movie cheesery you can only dream of: a man dressed in a polar-bear costume chasing the kids. We’re supposed to accept that it’s actually a polar bear.
48:00: Girl whines more about the cold, wishes the snow would stop. I wish she would freeze to death.
49:00: Yes! Torg! It’s a big robot! It is the worst movie robot I’ve ever seen! We’re talking cardboard box painted silver with dryer vents for arms and a bucket for a head. Torg apprehends the kids.
Billy to Keymar: “You won’t get away with this you—you—you Martians!” Was that a racial slur? That felt like a racial slur.
50:00: They plan to send Torg after Santa.
51:00: This is it. This is the moment I’ve been waiting for since I first saw a robot and thought, Man, how cool would it be if that robot fought Santa?
Torg busts in the workshop to some sharp strings and jittery camera work. As he topples workbenches, Winky throws himself in his path. This can only be awesome.
It’s not actually that awesome. Torg just lifts Winky up and carries him around until he confronts Santa, who mistakes him for a toy.
Keymar, watching through the window: “By the great dog star, Santa’s treating him like a toy!”
Boldar: “He’s become a toy…”
Keymar: “We’ll have to go in and get Santa ourselves.”
Wait, what? That was it? Torg was defeated by being treated like a toy? So apparently Keymar’s statement of “Nothing can stop Torg” came with an implicit addendum of “except being treated like a toy…but what are the odds that will happen in this particular confrontation? This confrontation with Santa Claus, the world’s greatest toymaker?”
Torg stands motionless in the workshop as Keymar and Boldar burst in and freeze some elves with a hairdryer. Torg is the worst robot ever (as illustrated by fig. 1). 55:00: Santa thinks the Martians are toys, too, but Winky informs him that they’re Martians. Winky’s mysterious knowledge of all things Martian is never explored.
56:00: The Martians take Santa back to Mars, but not before freezing Mrs. Claus with their hairdryers.
More stock footage of the world’s response.
58:30: Still stock footage. A good third of this movie has to be stock footage.
60:00: On the Martian ship, Santa begins to spread aforementioned “unstoppable Yuletide cheer.” Boldar calls them all “Martianmellows.”
61:00: Santa tells bad jokes, continues to be creepy.
63:00 Enter Droppo. Santa: “Haha! Here’s Droppo!” Really.
Billy is the best actor in this movie.
65:00: Boldar storms off with the stated intention of killing the children. No one reacts.
70:00: Boldar locks Santa and the children in the airlock. Santa: “He probably just stepped out for a moment.” Santa, you naïve schmuck!
Fortunately, there’s a small air duct in the room. An air duct about the size of a chimney. Turns out Santa’s very specific super-power actually comes in handy, as they all escape and have a hardy chuckle about it. Santa’s chuckle continues to be more unsettling than jolly.
75:00: Other stupid things happen and I make myself another drink, put my slippers on.
76:00: Back on Mars now, and Momar continues to look hotter and hotter.
78:00: The Martian children of indeterminate sex are introduced to the Earth children. Then Keymar introduces Santa, who by this point I’m sure should not be around children. Really sure.
80:00: Doors on Mars open by being pointed at. Droppo does a stupid dance to some Benny Hill send-off music.
81:00: This may be the worst movie ever.
82:00: Boldar and his goonies are scheming in a cave. A Martian approaches the cave: “It’s me, Jim!” Jim? Not Gomar or Lexar or Zod? Sure, whatever. They plan to sabotage Santa.
84:00: A look at Santa’s new workshop on Mars. It’s all automated. Santa: “Look at me—Santa Claus, the great toy maker, pressing buttons. That’s automation for ya. Technology. Hmph.” Did this just turn into a neo-Luddite film?
85:00: For an uncomfortable second, it looks like Keymar is asking if the children have been sexually abused by Droppo. It seems plausible, but fortunately we move on. As the Martians get merrier, the Earth children get less and less merry.
86:00: Through some dopplegangery, Droppo is kidnapped in lieu of Santa. No one notices that, unlike the real Santa, Droppo Santa is purple and has antennae. Boldar and his gang turn into the Three Stooges for some reason.
87:00: I am so Googling Momar.
93:00: Droppo escapes from the “nuclear curtain” holding him in the cave by…turning off the curtain. By pressing the button. The button that was located inside the nuclear curtain. It’s oversights like these that make me wonder how Boldar ever made it to the Martian council.
95:00: By this time it seems that all the purple makeup has run off and they couldn’t afford more.
100:00: Martian-ey things happen. Billy overhears Boldar planning to attack the real Santa, so they prepare for him.
101:00: Santa meets Boldar’s assault with THE MOST INSANE DEFENSE SEQUENCE EVER. Boldar dances in place as the children fire fake guns and bubbles at him and small toys scurry about his feet. He’s incapacitated by craziness. Or something. I don’t know. Everyone’s laughing now. Droppo is the Martian Santa.
The movie’s over. I’m so confused.
How the movie lived up to its title:
Occurrences of Santa Claus: High.
Occurrences of Martians: Very high.
Occurrences of Conquering: None at all.
A more appropriate title: Santa Claus Entertains the Martians
-Kyle Adams
In the hustle and bustle of college life, it’s likely that your living space is cluttered, disorganized, and crowded. The space you call home serves multiple functions, especially in a dorm room. It’s your bedroom, office, and living room all in one, but too much clutter in one area can clutter your mind too. Fortunately, the ancient Chinese practice of Feng Shui can help you improve your life by changing the energy in your room.
Feng Shui is believed to use laws of astronomy and geography to help improve life by channeling positive Qi, or energy flow. Feng Shui followers believe that deliberate placement of objects, such as furniture, creates balance and helps achieve harmony in an environment. Even in a dorm room, by applying some basic principles, Feng Shui can be used to make the best of the living space you have.
To begin, draw a diagram of your room and split it into nine equal areas – each of these areas represents a different aspect of your life. Hold the diagram so the door is at the bottom. In the top row (left to right) the squares represent Wealth, Fame, and Relationships. In the middle row, the squares represent Family/Health, Tao (Center), and Creativity/Children. The bottom row represents Knowledge, Career, and Helpful People.
From there, you can use symbolic object placement to begin channeling energy. For example, move your bookshelf to the knowledge corner, and put pictures of family and people that inspire you in the helpful people area. In the relationships corner, boost your energy by pairing items, like two statues or two candles – red candles are especially positive energy. Live plants in any section represent growth, so place one in the career or wealth sections. A collection of rocks help restrain positive Qi, so place some in an area where you need more stability.
Keep clutter to a minimum. This is one of the simplest ideas, and often overlooked in the typical college room. Whichever area of your room is gathering clutter is likely to be the aspect of your life that feels cluttered too. Also, waking up to a mess can create stress and negative energy before you even start your day. Since you typically can’t paint the walls in a dorm room or rented apartment, use artwork. Colorful selections are best, but keep them to a minimum. Too much art on the walls can become cluttered and disorganized, again creating negative energy.
According to Feng Shui principles, to build wisdom point objects east. If possible, place your desk against a wall that faces east to channel the studious energy. The best bed location is facing the door, but not directly in front of it. A bed located directly opposite a door exposes you to strong energy traditionally called the “death position.” It’s also good to have your headboard resting against a solid wall.
These are just some of the basic principles of Feng Shui, but hopefully they can help you create balance and harmony in your living space. Try shuffling your stuff today and see what channeling positive energy can do for you!
-Leland Strott
"Alright guys, lets settle this." The debate over who is the best player in the NBA has been raging recently and knowledgeable NBA fans know that it comes down to two guys who most people recognize by their first names; Kobe and LeBron.
The debate grew especially heated after Kobe dropped 61 points in Madison Square Garden against the Knicks and then LeBron came one rebound short or a triple-double the next night in the World’s Most Famous Arena and dropped 52 points.
Important Facts
1. Kobe has obviously won more. He’s won three championships and the Lakers nearly always have a better record than the Cavaliers. That said, Kobe has always had a strong supporting cast, from Shaq (big props to the big fella for his dancing at the All-Star game) to Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum (who is out hurt right now). This year LeBron has another player on his team who can take some pressure off of him, Mo Williams, for the first time in his NBA career.
2. This year LeBron is averaging more rebounds, assists, steals, and blocks per game than Kobe. LeBron has a higher points per game average than Kobe, 28.37 to 27.37. Not only does LeBron average more points per game, he does it with a better field goal percentage, 49.1 to 47.2
3. Playing for the USA in the 2008 Olympics LeBron outscored Kobe with 124 total points to Kobe’s 120. Virtually no difference there you say? LeBron did it on 21 less shots. In the Olympics LeBron nearly doubled Kobe in rebounds and assists – 42 to 22, and 30 to 17. LeBron doubled Kobe in blocks – 8 to 4, and more than doubled him with 19 steals to Kobe’s 9. Kobe fans might try to argue that LeBron got more playing time, but PT was virtually even. Kobe got 188 minutes while LeBron got 198 minutes.
4. Both brought their teams deep in the playoffs last year. But both lost to the three-headed dragon that is the Boston Celtics. (That dragon is growing a fourth head these days in Rajon Rondo, who joins Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett, and Ray Allen.) LeBron’s Cavs lost to the Beantown Triad and company in seven games, while the Kobe’s Lakers lost in six games.
5. This in the past, so it’s not as relevant to this argument as the other points, but it counts. Both Kobe and LeBron came to the NBA straight from high school. LeBron was the #1 overall pick in 2003. Kobe was drafted #13 overall in 1996. From the “Did you know?” category – Kobe was drafted by the Charlotte Hornets (remember them?) and traded to the Lakers for famous flopper Vlade Divac before he played his first NBA game. LeBron had an immediate impact as a rookie in 2003-04, averaging over 20 points, 5 rebounds, and 5 assists while helping the Cavaliers win 18 more games than they had in 2002-03. Kobe averaged 7.6 points per game and less than 2 assists per game as well as less than 2 rebounds per game in his first season.
Irrelevant Comparisons
1. LeBron is funnier. He is in some commercials that rival Peyton Manning for the best athlete commercials on TV these days. LeBron also hosted Saturday Night Live. I hesitate to bring this up, but Kobe’s commercial appeal has been shot since the rape allegations against him in 2003.
2. Kobe has two NBA scoring titles to LeBron’s one. But LeBron’s came last year in 2008, while Kobe’s were in 2006 and 2007. LeBron is poised to win another this year.
3. I believe that when LeBron gets isolation and decides to take his man to the basket he will score almost 100% of the time. That said, if my team was behind by one point with six seconds left in the game I would much rather have Kobe take the last shot to win the game.
4. Though LeBron looks like he’s 50 years old and Kobe looks like he could still be 18, Kobe is 30 and LeBron is 24.
5. Kobe won the 1997 Slam Dunk Contest. LeBron has never participated in a Slam Dunk Contest, but hinted that he may participate next year.
Verdict:
A) A random poll of people drinking Bud Light in my apartment found that LeBron is favored 4:1 among five slovenly college guys who watch too much ESPN. The Kobe vote came from a die-hard Lakers fan, so that one comes with a cascading cordillera of salt.
B) There has been a void in the NBA since Michael Jordan retired – from the Bulls. (MJ with the Wizards was like Joe Montana with the Chiefs or more recently Brett Favre with the Jets.) If anyone is the heir to His Airness it’s King James. He has commercial appeal and can will his team to wins, night in and night out. If that’s not enough, his recent statistics are recognizably better than any other player. The only knock on LeBron is that he has not earned any championship jewelry. But Kobe has never won a title without Shaq Daddy Diesel. LeBron will get a few titles after he signs with the Knicks in 2010.
I welcome all angry, profane responses from Kobe fans and look forward to a debate. Leave a comment if you have an opinion – but make sure you can back it up. (Read: Don’t say, “Fuck you. Kobe is better.” Support your statement.
-Andrew Sagarin
AROUND CAMPUS
20 Watts Pre-launch Party
Friday, February 20 at 7 p.m., Spark Art Space
Sarah Aument, The Annual Fund and The Smash Brothers perform.
Open Mic Night
Friday, February 20 at 8 p.m, Jabberwocky Café
“Where’s My Money”
Friday, February 20 through Sunday, February 22 at 8 p.m., Black Box Players
E-mail [email protected] for tickets
Caribbean Awareness Week Closing Brunch
Sunday, February 22 at 12 p.m., 201 ABC Goldstein Student Center
WEEKEND SPORTS
SU Men's Basketball v Villanova
Sunday, February 22 at 1 p.m., Carrier Dome, CBS
SU Women’s Hockey v NCCC
Sunday, February 22 at 3 p.m., Tennity Ice Rink
Don’t miss the last game of the season!
FOR THE MUSICALLY INCLINED
Mardi Gras Party
Friday, February 20 at 8 p.m., The Westcott Theater
Grupo Pagan, Samba La Ranja, and DJ Beija Flor perform.
Reggae/Dub Bands
Saturday, February 21 at 8:30 p.m., Funk ‘N Waffles
Giant Panda Guerilla Dub Squad and Sleeping Giant & Word of the Day perform.
Caroline Blue and Silent Fury
Saturday, February 21 at 9 p.m., The Lost Horizon
The Wood Brothers
Saturday, February 21 at 9 p.m., The Lost Horizon
Strange Design
Saturday, February 22 at 9 p.m., The Lost Horizon
--Amelia Bienstock
Oh, Lily Allen. You came on the scene with your curvy figure, raunchy mouth, dresses, and sneakers, and I, along with a lot of the UK, fell in love with you. You wandered over to the US, put out "Smile" and "Alfie" and developed an equally rabid fan base here. So with all these loyal fans desperately waiting for your next album, what do you do?
Fall into your sophomore slump.
Lily’s first album “Alright, Still” became so popular because of its sing along qualities, coupled with her ability to comedically tackle everyday situations. Allen recently said that "It's Not Me, It's You" was going in a new direction; that she had matured and the music would show it. To be blunt, the only direction this album took was downhill. In the process of showing off this newfound philosophical prowess, the actual production seems to have gotten lost. Most of the tracks are your typical electro-pop radio ditties, as repetitive as they are unoriginal. Allen has repeatedly dissed other artists, most recently Katy Perry, for using auto-tune. Yet almost all of her songs on “It’s Not You” use (something incredibly close to) autotune, making it impossible to distinguish her vocally from other pop princesses on the market.
That being said, some of the lyrics on “It’s Not Me, It’s You” are fantastic. Allen touches on the issues she had growing up without her father, (“He Wasn’t There”) age-obsessed culture (“22”) and everyone’s favorite person to hate, George Bush. (“F*** You”) There are a couple songs that still have that Lily Allen Spark previously seen on “Alright, Still.” The stand out “Never Gonna Happen” showcases Allen returning to her sassy ways, telling a guy he’s nothing more than a booty call. (“Now I know you feel betrayed/But it’s been weeks since I got laid/ This doesn’t mean that I don’t think you’re a fool.”) With a strange mix of beat poetry, accordion, and xylophone, this song is one of the few you can dance and sing along with. On the opposite end, you’ve got “Him”, a stale and unneeded revisiting of the themes in Joan Osbourne’s 1995 classic “One of Us.” (“What if God one was of us? Just a slob like one of us?” Yeah, you know you know it.) Allen attempts to update the song by mentioning 9/11, however she sings about the same ideas Osbourne did 14 years ago, personifying God and wondering if he’s just like you and me.
Overall, “It’s Not Me, It’s You” lacks direction at its best and disappoints completely at its worst. The majority of the songs are so cliché-filled or overwrought that the few good tracks on the record sound uncomfortably out of place. For her next album, I can only hope Allen will decide to further carve out a niche as an intelligent, worldly, and sympathetic figure, rather than becoming another mindless robot on the airwaves.
-V Ripson
Tattoos are forever. The decision to get one should not be an impulse, something you do to impress your friends, because you just want to look tough, or because you’re drunk. It requires a lot of consideration, time, pain, and money to get one that you will enjoy for the rest of your life. That being said, getting a tattoo can also be extremely meaningful and a rewarding experience. Here’s a guide to getting ink you can live with.
Obviously, the first step is deciding what you want to get. This is NOT the step where you walk into a parlor and pick impulsively from the hundred different variations of devils, butterflies, and Chinese symbols framed on the wall. These images are called flash art, and chances are that tribal design #457 isn’t going to be meaningful to you 15 years down the road.
Your best bet for getting the perfect tattoo is to work with a tattoo artist to design the image. Brainstorm ideas for things you want in the design, whether they’re certain symbols or just things you like, and take that list to the tattoo parlor you’ve chosen. If you have images that inspire you, take those as well to help the artist understand what you want. You can find many galleries online of completed tattoos, artist portfolios, and artwork to get ideas – just don’t try to duplicate anyone else’s tattoo.
Location will also be a consideration at this point. If you’re just starting out, your best bet is to get it somewhere easy to cover. Keep in mind that many people are quick to judge anyone with a tattoo. Just be aware how your tattoo could be perceived if it’s prominent on your wrist, knuckles, or neck.
Once you have ideas for the design and location, the artist will sketch some ideas for you. Their vision might not be exactly what you want right away, but continue to work with them to make sure the images and colors are exactly what you imagine. The artist won’t be insulted if you ask for a change – it’s artwork that will be on your body for life, you’re allowed to be picky. Once you think you’re in love with the design, take a copy of the image home and stare at it often for a few days. Make sure it’s something you will still like when you’re 25, 40, and 80. If you have any hesitations, make changes or find a new tattoo.
If you decide that your design is perfect and will withstand the test of time, it’s time to make your appointment to get it done! Eat a big breakfast before you go, and follow the tattoo artist’s directions for tattoo aftercare. And congrats – you’re inked!
Tattoo shops in Syracuse:
Scarab Body Arts: http://www.scarabbodyarts.com/
Halo Tattoo: http://www.halotattoo.com/
-Leland Strott
Let it be known that this is the last time I will discuss steroids in baseball.
The tired subject was raised again last week when Selena Roberts, a reporter for Sports Illustrated, unearthed evidence that Alex Rodriguez used steroids in 2003.
To his credit, Rodriguez responded quickly to the allegations, admitting he did use banned substances between 2001 and 2003 with the Texas Rangers.
Some thoughts:
1. Admitting use has been productive for Jason Giambi, Andy Pettitte and others. Rodriguez and his posse handled the confession well.
2. There are reported to be 103 other names on the list (which was turned over to the Federal Government and was supposed to be confidential) that revealed Rodriguez’s use. Why did only the name of arguably the best player in the game today become public?
3. How Rodriguez progresses will be interesting. He is the first high-profile player to be exposed while he is still in the middle of his career.
4. Rodriguez admitted use only between 2001 and 2003 in Texas. If this is the truth – great. If he used in Seattle, after he came to the Yankees, or even back in high school and indisputable evidence of it is found, he will be a villain in the same category as Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens.
5. Between the Mitchell Report and this sealed document there is proof that roughly 200 players in the “Steroid Era” used. These are the ones we know about – so you have to figure others used and did not get caught. At any given time there are 750 players on Major League rosters. From that we can estimate that somewhere between 33%-50% of players were using in the late 1990s and early 2000s.
6. That being said, I am not okay with A-Rod’s use, but I do not judge him as harshly as Mark McGwire, Bonds, Clemens, and Miguel Tejada (who has had his own steroid trouble recently and is facing jail time). Let’s say – for argument’s sake – that 50% of players were using. Let’s set aside the fact that using steroids is morally wrong and look at it objectively. Let’s remember that this is these guys’ job, their livelihood. Yes, they are overcompensated, but baseball is how they support their families. Baseball players have shorter careers in their industry than almost any other. (How many other jobs can you think of where people retire in their late 30s or early 40s?) To stay on top of their games and compete many, including A-Rod, used performance-enhancing substances.
7. Going all the way back to Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa (who has not yet been proven to have used banned substances) owners knew about steroid use among players and said nothing while records were broken and attendance soared for the first time since the lockout in 1994.
8. Journalists further proved that we are the 4th branch of the government by exposing steroid use in baseball and other sports.
9. Will ESPN and the rest of the sports media please get off A-Rod’s jockstrap already?
10. And can we drop the subject of steroids and move on? There will always be unethical chemists working on the next designer drug (genetic doping might be the next trend). There will always be athletes looking for that extra edge. But for now baseball, and most other sports, seem to be on top of things regarding performance-enhancing substances.
Spring Training is under way…
-- Andrew Sagarin
Drag, a rematch and some V-day love on the ice. These are the events you do not want to miss this weekend.
Cinelatte Film: "Cilantro y Perejil”
Friday, February 13 at 6:30 p.m., 207 Hall of Languages
The Program on Latin America and the Caribbean (PLACA) will be showing this comedic film about couples hit by the economic crisis in Mexico. Free snacks and coffee will be provided.
Totally Fabulous VII: The Final Show
Friday, February 13 at 8 p.m., Goldstein Auditorium
Watch student finalists compete for the title of 2009 Drag King and Queen of the Hill.
SU Men’s Basketball v Georgetown
Saturday, February 14 at 12 p.m., Carrier Dome
Orange-out the Dome and cheer on Flynn, Devendorf and the rest as they take on Georgetown for the second time this season. Could the ultimate Valentine’s Day present be retaliation?
Valentine’s Night at the Rink
Saturday, February 14 at 9 p.m., Tennity Ice Rink
Take your sweetie, or your best friends, out for a fun night of ice-skating. Sponsored by SCOPE, the event is free for South Campus residents and $5 for other students.
SU Men’s Lacrosse v Providence
Saturday, February 14 at 3:30 p.m., Carrier Dome
Don’t miss the first game of the year. Can the team become national champs once again?
-Elizabeth A Reid
Looking for something to do today? Below is a short list of events happening on campus today. For a full list of events, please click here.
Today's Events
12:30 p.m.
Romeo & Juliet Preview, Setnor Auditorium
4 p.m.
Speaker: Donald R. Prothero, Life Sciences Complex Auditorium
5:30 p.m.
Chancellor's Citation for Excellence Awards, Flaum Grand Hall, Whitman School
8 p.m.
Symphony Band/Wind Ensemble, Setnor Auditorium
8 p.m.
Garth Fagan Dance, Goldstein Auditorium
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